That time I helped make a pumpkin (at Luke Adams Glass)

Having had a complete BLAST at Luke Adams Glass when my sister and I went for a fused glass jewelry class a while back, we both decided that we absolutely HAD to go for a glass-blowing class, as well. Since Luke Adams Glass appears to participate with all of the various group-buy vendors (Groupon, Living Social and Amazon Local being the ones I’ve seen), it’s a pretty easy and low-cost way to get in on a class. Our deal was $85 for two people doing a one-hour glass-blowing workshop (which typically runs $90 per person).

The only rules were to wear cotton clothing and closed-toed shoes, so even though it was one of the hotter days in early June, we strapped on the warmer clothing and left our sandals at home. We were offered the option of making any one of three items: a pumpkin, a paperweight, or an ornament. My sister immediately went for the pumpkin and I decided to go for the paperweight, having fallen in love with a really cool looking paperweight that had a flower or a tornado of color trapped inside clear glass. We were each offered dual colors – so my sister chose lime and teal (for the pumpkin and stem, respectively) and I chose blue and violet for my flower.

Some of our color options

Some of our color options

My sister went first: the initial step being that she had to get hot glass on this very long metal wand. She placed the tip of it into an exceptionally hot oven that contained nothing but glass. She then brought it out and rolled the wand on a stand that helped cool the center of the wand as she rotated it – effectively keeping the glass from cooling in an oddball shape at the far end of the wand.

Cooling off the wand

Cooling off the wand

A few dips into the lime coloring on a tray, and off she went to put the tip end of the wand into an oven that did nothing but blast HEAT onto the glass to merge the color with the glass. All the while, she’s turning, turning, turning, and feeling tremendous heat. Our instructor then briefly borrowed the wand from my sister so that she could lengthen the glass in preparation for shaping the pumpkin.

Our instructor, lengthening the glass prior to pumpkin shaping

Our instructor, lengthening the glass prior to pumpkin shaping

After a little while, the instructor and my sister upended the wand and put it, tip-first, into a mold that impressed the grooves that would help define the pumpkin shape, then my sister sat at a bench and continued to turn the wand while I blew air into the far end, giving the pumpkin the air needed to get its shape.

Shaping the pumpkin in the mold

Shaping the pumpkin in the mold

Once the pumpkin shape was fairly well set, the wand and pumpkin were moved over to a bench and my sister got to use a torch to keep the top of the pumpkin nice and warm while our instructor quickly made the stem.

The pumpkin awaits its stem

The pumpkin awaits its stem

Making the stem was basically the same process as what was done for the pumpkin except that it was done at a much higher rate of speed and she wound the stringy, grooved, teal concoction around another metal wand to create the shape of the stem. Once that was done, the gorgeous pumpkin – still glowing hot – was carefully moved to a special oven that slowly brings the glass items down from 950F to room temperature over the course of several days in order to keep them from shattering as they cool. (Without this special oven, the outside of the glass would cool while the hot inside continued to expand…and you’d end up with a lot of very pretty colored glass EVERYWHERE.)

The shaped glass for the stem is dropped onto the pumpkin...

The shaped glass for the stem is dropped onto the pumpkin…

...and quickly wound to make the trademark curl

…and quickly wound to make the trademark curl

We then went into working on my piece – and though I was initially hesitant to ask for a flower shape, the instructor explained that it’s easy (of course it is, dear), and off we went. The process started basically the same (get exceptionally hot glass onto the end of a wand), although I had a mixture of colors that I dipped my glass into before I fired it further.

Dipping the glass in blue and violet to make my flower

Dipping the glass in blue and violet to make my flower

To make the round shape I wanted for my paperweight, I got to use a wet wooden tool that basically looks like a giant soup ladle, and I held it against the hot glass while I rotated the wand. Of course, the heat from the glass gets to the point where it dries all of the water on the ladle tool, at which point you see sparks. Every time that would happen, I would need to stop, quickly dip the ladle tool into the nearby water bucket, and then continue the process of turning the glass against the wet wood.

Working the wooden ladle tool...

Working the wooden ladle tool…

At one point, when it was time to make the flower “stem”, I was given what looked essentially to be an awl and just straight-on poked a hole in the top of the glass. I also was handed a pair of pincers that I used to pinch off the top of the glass, creating enough of a break that we’d eventually be able to separate the paperweight from the wand. The shaping process all set, we moved my piece to the table where I got to work the torch on the top to seal things off a bit, and then my piece was also moved into the über-hot oven to cool off over the next few days.

...and then the pincers...

…and then the pincers…

...and then a torch!

…and then a torch!

As you can tell from these pictures, the colors don’t look a thing like what we’d asked for. This is because the glass is eleventy kajillion degrees Fahrenheit. We were assured that they’d look just as we’d requested when they were fully cooled. I also know that I skipped at least a few descriptions of “and then we put the glass back into the heat-only oven, which runs on the order of about 2000F, IIRC”, but that’s just because it’s incredibly hard to take notes while doing glass-blowing.

When I came to pick up the items a week later (most items are ready for pickup only a few days later), I was taken aback at how gorgeous both pieces were. Given that neither my sister nor I ever had any experience blowing glass and neither of us had a clue of how to make glass art, it was a revelation that – with the appropriate instruction and assistance – in less than an hour we could make these incredible pieces. Each one is a work of art in its own way, and both of us feel like that was a totally cool experience that we would ABSOLUTELY do again.

My sister's gorgeous pumpkin: lime green with a teal stem

My sister’s gorgeous pumpkin: lime green with a teal stem

My lovely paperweight - a side view of the stem

My lovely paperweight – a side view of the stem

...and a view from the top of the flower effect and a pretty bubble trapped forever

…and a view from the top of the flower effect and a pretty bubble trapped forever

A couple of observations:

1) It’s incredible to me how many of the tools and techniques probably haven’t changed in hundreds of years. The wooden ladle tool, the use of water, the metal pincers…none of these things look like they’ve changed in forever, and yet the technology appears to need no improvement.

2) I’m not a big fan of heat, so I can imagine that I’d be pretty parched after doing this for three hours (workshops come in 1hr and 3hr lengths). I suspect that having the ability to put water nearby for when I’m not actively working with glass would be a good idea for longer classes.

3) The instructors at Luke Adams Glass continue to be phenomenal. At no point did I ever feel worried for my safety or completely lost in what I was supposed to do; in the cases where the instructor felt she needed to assist to correct technique, finish off a tricky part or provide a second pair of hands, she was RIGHT THERE.

As far as having a fun, well-managed and inexpensive way to make art with friends or family, this totally fit the bill. I’m definitely looking forward to getting back to the studio again sometime in the near future so that I can have more fun playing with glass. I was impressed by how easy it was to make these gorgeous pieces, and I’m absolutely planning to go back for more.

Disclaimer: Neither Groupon nor Luke Adams Glass provided anything in exchange for this post; I wrote this on my own, under my own steam, and solely because I WANTED TO WRITE THIS TO SHOW MY SUPPORT OF A WICKED COOL LOCAL BUSINESS. The Groupon deal used to take this class was paid for 100% by me and my sister, without any additional offsetting by a third party. All opinions expressed above are my own.

20 books and 20 lbs (week 27): Devouring Neil Gaiman

Once upon a time, there was a young boy who had something bad happen with one of the lodgers at his house. Now, depending upon whether you’re looking for real life or fiction, you can either interpret that as an opening statement on a story from author Neil Gaiman’s life or his latest novel, “The Ocean at the End of the Lane”.

Book #7: “The Ocean at the End of the Lane” by Neil Gaiman

Wow. I loved this book. Let me preface this by saying that I’ve been a fan of Gaiman’s ever since I was first introduced to his completely sick and twisted mind by “Sandman”. Add some “American Gods” (woah) into the mix, plus “Stardust” (aww…cute!) and “Neverwhere” (WTH just happened?!) to you get a picture of someone who’s clearly got his mind wrapped around many dimensions simultaneously. It also doesn’t hurt that he’s written two amazing episodes of “Doctor Who” and that my kids love “Chu’s Day” – his most recent publication strictly aimed at the younger set.

So, with all of that in mind, I cracked open my signed first edition almost immediately upon boarding the train for New York, on my way to a conference. I had a solid block of time to myself – about 3-1/2hrs on the Acela – and that seemed like a good time to start reading “Ocean”. Turns out, it was a good time to read it and FINISH it. I don’t think I’ve ever finished a book so fast in my life. It’s not that it was a quick read in the sense that it was breezy or whimsical. I couldn’t put it down because it was engrossing and utterly fantastic, leaving me breathless as I turned each page wondering what would befall the unnamed protagonist next.

“The Ocean at the End of the Lane” opens with the narrator wandering around after a funeral, taking a detour fueled by muscle memory that brings him back to a small rural town where he once lived. As he sits by the small pond in the backyard of a former neighbor, his memories come flooding back and you’re transported back to his childhood – where immortal beings and other realities freely mix with the reality most of us know. The narrator stumbles onto the evidence that a being from another world, something of immense power, has been tampering with the lives of the people in his village, and he enlists the help of an eccentric girl who is seemingly only a few years older than himself.

As it turns out, of course, she’s nothing of the sort – and she takes him into another part of the world, where faerie clearly reigns more than the laws of science. They encounter an evil presence that follows them back into our world and ingratiates itself into his family as the nanny from Hell. The rest of the story is an insane thrill-ride as the protagonist tries to rid himself – and the world – of this demonic force from beyond time. As with so many of Gaiman’s other works, to read too much into the possibility is either to scare yourself half to death or to shake it off as utterly unbelievable. I prefer to think of his stories as best read when the lights are firmly set in the ON position, and this book is no exception. I loved it and would highly recommend it. Clearly, it was a fast read (I was done with it within about 3hrs), but that’s a GOOD THING. Devouring a book is what it’s all about – when you find something that speaks to you, that you can’t imagine putting down, that’s my idea of a truly great read.

*   *   *   *   *

Book #8 is “Ender’s Game” by Orson Scott Card, and I’m enjoying that immensely, as well. It’s causing me no shortage of insomnia, though, partially due to the content and partially due to the fact that I’m having trouble putting it down. Truly, having books be so good that you want to stay up all night to read them is what I’d consider “a good problem to have”.

As far as anything else goes, like weight loss, the trip to NYC was far better for reading than it was for managing my weight. I was in my conference, meetings, and schmoozy, heavy dinners from about 8am until 9pm every day, so I didn’t get nearly enough of that NYC walking that I really enjoy. I saw a few pounds added onto the scale (ugh), but I consider that a challenge and not a complete setback. A quick mid-week weigh-in showed a lower amount than I saw on weigh-in day, but since I only weigh myself ONCE a week (officially), I’m still sticking with the higher number I got on Sunday. Lesson learned: eating your way through a conference without walking or other forms of exercise is NOT smart. Got it.

Movie Trailer World Premiere: “Delivery Man”

What does family mean to me?

I was posed this question by my friend at Disney, who asked me (along with 532 other “mommy bloggers”) to participate in a unique stunt: to offer the premiere of the official trailer for the new Vince Vaughn movie on our websites. By now, y’all are used to me saying that I DO NOT shill. So, let me start this off by reminding everyone that I don’t shill and that I only write about or promote things of interest to me. Disney didn’t pay for this space and there’s no quid-pro-quo going on. I’m writing and posting this trailer because the topic is of interest to me and…really, if the trailer is an indication, this is a movie that’s got some serious promise.

Before I get back to the question at hand, let me give a brief take on what “Delivery Man” is all about. Vince Vaughn (“Swingers”, “The Internship”) plays the lead – David Wozniak – a bit of a loser, a drifter, someone who doesn’t seem to have his act quite together and who is failing at his attempts to hang onto his girlfriend (Colbie Smulders – whose jumpsuit alone stole many scenes in “Marvel’s The Avengers”). Wozniak’s life takes a decidedly left turn when he’s informed that his decades-prior sperm bank donations prolifically spawned 533 children, 142 of whom are suing the sperm bank so they can find out the name of their dad. Wozniak then stumbles through trying to learn what it means to be a dad by playing “guardian angel” to some of those kids, against the arm-waving advice of his attorney  friend, played by Chris Pratt (“Parks and Recreation”, “Zero Dark Thirty”).

Chris Pratt and Vince Vaughn

Wozniak gets schooled on what it means to be a parent

Clearly, the movie has some classic elements of the typical Vince Vaughn comedy – he pratfalls, he acts the oaf, he does things that make you wince and squirm in your seat because no well-adjusted person would do half of what he does. However, the movie also appears to have a strong emphasis on what it means to step up to the plate to be a dad, even when your family is as non-traditional as they come. Pratt’s character clearly provides not only the voice of caution but also that of experience: playing a dad on-screen, he’s showing what the traditional dad figure looks like, which is a stark contrast to the converted dad played by Vaughn.

Wozniak looks over profiles of his kids

Is this Vaughn’s shot to show he has range?

I can’t truly predict whether this movie will be one-star or four, but I can say that it’s intriguing to see Vaughn try to branch out into something a bit more dramatic. This has the potential to be his “Truman Show”, which displayed Jim Carrey’s solid dramatic chops in a fashion that took seemingly everybody by surprise. Having seen Vaughn be ever so money in “Swingers” years ago, and loving him as the “EARMUFFS!” dad in “Old School” and Wes Mantooth in “Anchorman”, I’d like to see if he has some serious range.

So, then, back to the idea of family…and this is where the whole Vince Vaughn piece really comes together for me. When you’re a parent, you can’t always be serious – it would be too exhausting. Kids want, need, and crave playfulness, humor and a sense that a smile is always around the corner. On the other hand, you can’t always just be a playmate – you have to provide structure and security, things that kids need but can’t create easily on their own. Family structures have evolved so much over generations, and the family image some people loudly deify as “traditional” isn’t even a century old. Go back hundreds of years and traditions involved families run by and around the mothers or grandmothers, families where multiple generations lived under the same roof, and families where children followed only in the footsteps of their father. Well, male children, at least.

What family means to me is the people that I come home to – whether that home is my house or somewhere else. For so many years before I started dating dh, my friends extended the family into which I was born; in addition to my parents and my sister, I had several close friends with whom I share everything but a common genome. Ten years ago, I decided to make a family with my best friend by marrying him, and then we expanded our family further by having dd 3 years later and ds 3 years after that. Our family unit may seem “traditional”, but I think we’re no more or less valid as a family than unmarried couples with kids, families with parents of the same gender, single parents, childless couples…

To me, family is whatever you make of it. It’s the people who support you and who love you, even when you’re driving them up the wall. Family doesn’t have to be one-man-one-woman. Families are based on love, not on chromosomal content.

So, without any further ado, here’s the official trailer for Disney’s, “Delivery Man”, which opens in theaters on November 22, 2013. And before you get any ideas about taking YOUR family to see it, please note that it is rated PG-13 for mature themes, so it’s probably not appropriate for the smallest members of your brood.